Lindsey's Mental Health Interview

Who are you?

I’m Lindsey, one of the founders of Grey Bandit and Ride The Wave along with my siblings Courtney and Robert. We’re actually triplets! Grey Bandit was my senior-year college project and we decided to take the risk and make it into a reality. Mental health and mental illness awareness are things we have always advocated for, as we have personally had our own experiences. The goal of Grey Bandit and Ride The Wave is to create a community that feels confident, loved, heard, and safe. 

Do you have a diagnosis? If so, what?

In April 2024, I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder. I had struggled with anxiety since college but as I got further into my adult years the anxiety became more debilitating. 

What does mental health mean to you?

Mental health means a lot to me. It’s about prioritizing my well-being and making sure to do my best to create a safe space for my mind. It means getting real and raw with myself and allowing myself to feel all my feelings. To confront trauma head-on and give myself grace and understanding the way I would with anyone else. For those that may not struggle mentally, it can be hard for someone from the outside looking in to understand. But mental health also means breaking those barriers and stigmas that surround it and hopefully giving others a better understanding of it. Everyone has mental health, the same way everyone has physical health! It is SO important to take care of both!

When did your journey begin?

My journey with mental health really began with my sister Courtney. Courtney is one of the main reasons we wanted to incorporate a mental health initiative for Grey Bandit. We knew we would be reaching others who could be going through similar things and felt like it would be the perfect platform to raise awareness for mental health and mental illness. Courtney had been struggling with both in high school and at the time, I was an outsider to those feelings. I didn’t know much about mental health or mental illness and wasn’t sure how to be an ally for my sister. From the time she was diagnosed with depression and anxiety, I did my best to try to understand what she was going through and show compassion. 

When I got to college, I had my very first experience with anxiety. The anxiety worsened as I entered sophomore year of college. My parents were going through a divorce, I felt a bit lonely, and life felt confusing at that point in time. The anxiety lingered but I did my best to push it aside and figured I would just keep myself busy to forget about it. 

I didn’t do a “good” job suppressing those anxious thoughts throughout the remainder of college and when I graduated I felt like there was hope that I would never feel sick from anxiety ever again. Wrong. The transition from college to the real world is such a challenging time. Over the years since graduating and starting this business, the anxiety has deepened, almost feeling debilitating at points. A few years back I would go days and days without sleeping and this would go on for years. I started seeing a therapist because I really needed someone to speak to about all the thoughts and feelings I couldn’t quite grasp myself. I really needed tools to help understand myself a bit better. However, in April 2024, I had a major panic attack in public and decided that was the final straw. I desperately needed help as I couldn’t eat or sleep and finally reached out to a psychiatrist to get me on the right medication so I could get back to living my life without feeling sick every single day. 

What has helped and what hasn’t helped during your journey?

Therapy has been one of the most helpful tools for me. I know there are so many barriers when it comes to receiving therapy and I truly am so grateful to have a wonderful therapist. She has given me an array of tools to use when I’m in crisis throughout the years. Also writing my feelings down has really helped me understand my thoughts more and provides such a release. I also have to say medication has been helpful for me. I know it is not for everyone and you should 100% consult a doctor. However, in terms of my awful sleep which stemmed from anxiety, medication has changed my life. I have so much more energy and the anxiety levels I experience are much lower.

I would say the one thing that hasn’t helped is being closed off in therapy. Therapy is only truly helpful when you can be open and honest. It took me years to feel comfortable enough not to hold anything back. And I don’t regret that at all, but I do think if I had allowed myself to be open a bit earlier I could’ve gotten through some more things with a bit more ease and relief. 

What is the hardest part about having a mental health struggle?

For me, it’s feeling alone in my thoughts and not feeling like someone is trying to listen or understand me when I speak about my feelings. Another thing is feeling like I’m a prisoner of my own mind sometimes. Even though I do the work on myself, there are still times I slip into this old habit where I can’t stop the cycle of negative self talk and it’ll get to the point where I need to crawl out of my own skin. So I would say the way the physical symptoms sometimes manifest with anxiety is definitely one of the hardest parts about having a mental health struggle. 

What stigmas have you faced?

The biggest stigma I have faced is the comment “Well, you don’t look like you have anxiety”, and this was something I’ve heard from multiple people. Other than that I haven’t faced too many other stigmas. It’s more so been some people just telling me I’m fine and to stop thinking so much, which doesn’t help in any scenario!

What advice would you give your younger self?

I would say it’s okay not to be okay. It’s okay to let people in. It’s okay to be vulnerable. You’re stronger than you think you are but you don’t have to carry the weight of the world on your own. You are your own worst critic. No one else is thinking about you the way you think about you so self love is SO important!